Resolution 3.1, Human Rights

Committee: Organization of Islamic Conference
OIC/Resolution 3.1
Sponsors: UAE, Uzbekistan, Mali
Signatories: Burkina Faso, Oman, Sierra Leone, Djibouti, Nigeria, Iraq, Syria, Sudan, Benin, Togo, Yemen, Cameroon, Turkmenistan, Azerbaijan, Somalia

Human Rights (and other stuff)

Recognizing the lack of human rights (and sleep) among all countries of the OIC,
Realizing that Allah has made us supreme rulers of the universe,
Aware of the fact that we are not offended by anything the chairs have done (don’t worry guys, it’s all good)

1. Urges that all states play nice;
2. Calls for a wall built around the Zionist state so it can be flooded (water will be purified to remove any traces of Judaism and then used to water Mali);
3. Encourages governments to not kill people unless they REALLY really have to;
4. Requests that Iran stop being so mean to everyone;
5. Deplores the a**-raping of Mali by Canada;
6. Further encourages Djibouti to participate in relationship counselling;
7. Demands Sudan go get his coffee like everyone else instead of having it delivered on a silver platter;
8. Further encourages everyone to spread the Islamic love;
9. Decides to remain actively seized of the matter.